The Mediocre Designer says your site is crap

…so you KNOW you’ve done wrong. Take note, designers, these tidbits are referencing pages that actually appear on various web design companies’ own sites. Yes, your high-end or mediocre brethren made these errors:

1. Your design website still has a “copyright 2004″ at the bottom. It is 2009 and, as of this posting, nearly 5 months into the year. Update your site, it looks mighty unprofessional to have the wrong year. It also looks like maybe you aren’t in business anymore.
2. Woman with wind-blown hair wearing headphones. Example. It’s overused and doesn’t have any clear message. It’s likely supposed to give the impression of “airy freedom” but what it really says to me is “I was feeling uncreative that day so reached for the low-hanging fruit.” This image is the opposite of innovation. *
3. Business man or woman with folded arms (or laptop) and a blue sky behind them, looking smug. What? Why? Again with the “airy freedom” that really says “this is overdone and improbable and, more importantly, uncreative.” *
4. On your company portfolio, having a blurry snapshot of a site you designed. I really like Metaspring’s stuff since it’s colorful and catchy (no, I don’t work there), but this? Bad news, man. If it were up to me, I’d actually clean off a couple of their more aged items, since their newer stuff is more interesting.
5. Anything that re-sizes my frickin’ browser when I click it. This just happened.  I won’t even link to the offending site it ticked me off so much. Check yo javascript before you wreck yoself.
6. Last, and likely the most important one: If you are using the term “rich media” anywhere on your site, put down your mouse, find a phonebook and get a hold of a nice job-search expert because you need to find a new career right now. That is an old term that only old fogeys use, coined back when people called links “hyperlinks” and the term “hypertext” was also commonly used. Do not ever use this term. I don’t care WHAT that 10-year veteran of web design told you. He doesn’t know jack and his designs probably look like Geocities cast-offs.

*I will try not to apply sciences to these, but since you asked: Girl with headphones is usually pictured standing indoors. Where is the wind coming from? Why would business people be standing outside? In suits? What are they smug about? I think it looks pretentious.